Radical Loss of Mind

 

Student: I keep coming up against a wall, well there’s a few, one of them is that sort of point where it feels like I’m losing my mind, like completely just groundless. You’ve said to a few other people that, you know, all the experiences are completely safe and trustworthy, I guess I do have this fear that maybe there is a point of no return, and then I kind of find or I get desperate. I find these ways of exiting, you know?

 

AishaI can’t really describe to you how thoroughly you’re going to lose your mind.

 

StudentI think that’s both my fear and what I want.

 

AishaOf course it is, of course it is. But I can say that once you’ve entered that embrace, the only way is through.  So asking for things to be less intense, despite the fact or the way that things are, it isn’t that there isn’t somewhere it gets less intense, but as the human experience it gets less intense.

 

But as long as there are parts, bits and pieces of your life which rolls with the identification, which moves with “I wish I could avoid this”, or something like this, these are all bits and pieces that are just waiting to be tossed into the fire, you know?  And in a way, I would say that we are less with control over this ride than I can even discuss with you, like really.  And the more that we agree to let go and the more that we trust, the more it speeds up.  But at the same time, even though it’s endless, in some ways, it’s also end after end after end after end.

 

And what I can say is that, especially when it comes to embracing the depth of the Woman, before I was very much bodily affected by the immensity of the powers moving here, and it created bodily fire and things. But I also found out, in that embrace of the depths – which I didn’t do to get something to stop, you know?  It’s not how it works, but you know that already – but it’s like in the depths of that, the friction point, that which creates that immensity, intensity, fire; that goes up in smoke.

 

And when the friction inside of the bodymind is no longer there, in one sense, reality just uncovers itself as more and more and more immense, but the human experience of it greatly goes into more something like a balance, where a harmonious existence is possible.

© 2017 Aisha Salem

Log in with your credentials

Forgot your details?